Friday, 31 August 2012

GAMEDAY 101

Now that kickoff is underway and tailgate season has (FINALLY) arrived, here are the ins and outs of football season:

Now, I can promise you that no school is exactly the same, I have visited a few others for games and each has their own traditions.  I'll just try and focus on SEC and other southern schools because that's what I know best.  So ladies, pull out your dresses and pledges, pull out your jackets and ties.  It's the beautiful months of the pigskin.


1.  Frat Row

This is Mecca of the football universe for college kids looking for a nice tailgate.  Greek or not, if you're a girl, you'll be able to find plenty of thirst quenching... "Gatorade" here, of all different "flavors."  For guys, pledge a fraternity or find your own way to have fun, because quite frankly being a brother is the only way that'll grant you access to The Row.

2.  What to Wear

I know if you're like me the first thing you want to do is run for your jersey and sneakers.  WRONG.  Hopefully you've heard by now that us ladies typically wear a Gameday dress in the color of our school, accompanied with some boots or sandals.  And the dresses are usually Lily or another type of Sunday Church attire.  I'm not saying that I don't take a game off or two and throw on the jersey and leggings with boots (which grows more acceptable for out-of-conference games) but remember everyone else is going to be dressed to the 10s.  If there is one thing you must learn it is that football is a way of life (and that's not just me talking).

Oh! Don't forget it cools down DRAMATICALLY at night when you're pushing into late October, so bring a jacket, even if everyone is sweating bullets at 3pm.  Check the night weather too incase there is a chance of rain.

Heels you will die in.  Take my word for it.



For the boys (or FTB as I like to say...), if you're not pledging then you pretty much have free reign on what to wear.  If you want to dress up to look the part, a pair of shorts and a button-down works.  Also, a team-colored tee in a pinch.

3.  Dates

I know for a fact that generally speaking the Greek community at the University of Alabama typically brings dates to the game (at least that is how it was when I visited last year).  I can't really elaborate on the subject considering I'm at a rival SEC school, however, I just wanted to give you a heads-up.  Rumor has it if a gent can't find a date he brings a broom...

4.  Choose Wisely

If your parents want to come into town for a game, try and pick a 1pm or a 3pm game.  Tailgating starts around 10am, so if it's pushing 7pm for a 7:30 kickoff, you can bet you'll no longer want to meet up with your jolly old folks after being on The Row or crowning yourself as the Beer Pong champ for 9 hours.

5.  If you do drink...

Take it slow.  It's a loooong day and no one wants to miss the game after fraternizing with Mr. Cuervo for too fast too long.  My rule:  Mix Drinks > Shots.  And, don't forget the tailgate food!!

6.  Prepare to go out... after.

I mean who the hell doesn't wanna celebrate a win?!...Or drown your sorrows in a loss?  If you know you'll need a nap after the game (no one is typically out until 11:30 anyways) then most people leave early.  I, on the other hand, cannot do such a thing because of my insanity and sports loyalty, but people call me crazy for it.  So rest up and get changed because the bars are certainly generous if your team is over .500 (Maybe this season I'll know how that feels.)


If you're from a northern school (I'm talking about above the Mason Dixon line) please email me with your gameday traditions!!  I've yet to make the trip up to BC to see my beautiful cousin! Shame on me, I know.

Reporting back soon, as I have promised,
xoxx Meg.

Monday, 27 August 2012

Good Day!

I just wanted to apologize for the lack of posts.  I've moved back to school and just got an entire new pledge class added to my sorority!  Unfortunately that means I could not communicate with potential new members. Therefore, the blog had to go MIA.

So, for your enjoyment these topics will be released over the next few days:

1) VELD Festival overview/Rave 201
2) What to Know: Gameday rundown for football Saturdays in the SEC
3) Painting Coolers and other Fratty things you must master

...and other suggestions.

Glad to be back.  Glad to be writing.  Glad to be a damn Vol.

Friday, 3 August 2012

Mello Jam Fest: The Stuff You Skipped Over

I come to you tonight with some great music.  Most of which is off older albums that often get overlooked because of the other more "mainstream" tracks on the disk.  Hopefully this will inspire you to listen to the whole album, like the artist intended, rather than wasting $1.29 on iTunes for the most commercialized piece they'd ever (probably only partially) written.

So here's a few hidden gems I hope you enjoy:

John Mayer: 3x5

Before his days of douchebaggery and dates with Katy Perry, this gent from Connecticut stole my once-existent-hipster heart.  The entire album is my favorite ever, by a long shot (I know, gasp from your leather pants, Keith Richards).  Straight from Hyperion Express (If you're ever in Fredericksburg, VA, check out this awesome hipster coffee hotspot),  his lyrics are both deep and harmonic.  Please please please listen to the whole thing once all the way through.  Great driving music, especially "Why Georgia" as making reference to, well, driving.

This happens to be one of my favorite songs of all time, not surprisingly.  Its message and poetry are something he long lost after sleeping with Jennifer Aniston.  For the record, I don't blame her one bit.
Enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GP5gWbyuXrs

Adele: Best For Last

For any girls that feel like you just got played, this is the jam for you.  It's such a perfect "Fuck you, I'mma sit here and drink my wine while I do my own cool shit" song for one of those nights.  Trust, I know how many girls can have those on average a week.

It's off her "19" album which is tied with her "21," in my opinion.  These were her days on SNL singing "Chasing Pavements" and other pieces of genius before her career took off.  Basically she's one of those (now) mainstream artists that you can't hate because she actually has the talent to be famous.  My advice is to just put her on replay 'til you kick the bucket.  Excellent to clean a house to, as I found out today.  Also perfect for just being in love with life and over the immaturity of silly boys... carrying on!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0migiRoRvA

Mac Miller: Diamonds And Gold

I know I'm going to get some grief putting him in this, but the last 4 songs on his "Blue Slide Park" album really stuck out to me ("Diamonds and Gold", "Missed Calls", "Man In The Hat", and "One Last Thing").  Together they create what few artists accomplish with a flowing album, meaning the songs drift into one another with a natural rhythm.  I've only really heard this successfully a few times, while others just cause a mess of too much effort.

As this track features a story of an independent woman, I find myself envisioning just an afternoon in a Jeep with RayBans cruising around with a few chicks listening to Mac.

Give it a try, there's no harm.  If you don't like it, I understand.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXlnGVd2r8g

Lana Del Ray: Blue Jeans

She hasn't hit it big yet, but this song is the shit.  It's so calm, cool and collected.  She'd totes be a frat star if she wasn't so damn good at making music.

Ms. Del Ray's got a retro vibe, I'm feeling a Duffy comparison, with a hint of orgasmic melody. I hope that convinces you to listen.  Not to mention, her look is pretty awesome.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRWox-i6aAk

Trey Songz: Made To Be Together

I really don't think I have to reiterate how godly Trey's voice is, but in case you need a reminder, the album cover is enough to satisfy any doubt of his angelic nature. *Swoon* Oh Jesus.

Anyways, this piece definitely stuck out on my first round of listening to his work.  This and "Black Roses" off of his Ready (2009) album.  I would have put that track here, but I feel like "Made To Be Together" exercises his vocal capabilities and heartwarming love a little more.  Lord, does he brings the sappy tween out in me or what?

Also excellent over a bottle of white wine with the ladies while getting ready for a good night out.  Trust me, you'll believe you can sing just as good as Mr. Songz by your third glass.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfLo42fDRJo

Jason Aldean: Relentless

So I guess this isn't completely underground, but for those of you, like myself, who have fallen into the black hole of country music within the past two years or so, this song is a must on your "Southern Belle" playlist.  To say that I'm an Alden fan would be an understatement.  I think I've just about set my life ambition to marry a Georgian gent like him (obviously before I graduate, as all other gals from Tennessee wish) and raise a high school quarterback on some ranch below the Mason Dixon.  #noshame

Throw it on repeat, because it's worth it.  I know every damn word as it's a 17 hour drive back to school.  Try me, bitches.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R740ztWmE9M


JRDN: U Can Have It All

Ok, for all you Canadians please don't throw a huge fit that I put this on here, but rather possibly appreciate that I am trying my darnest to spread the Canadian music love.

JRDN (I'm assuming it's pronounced Jordan, because vowels are soooo overrated), is a hip hop R&B artist that I would consider to be as if Trey Songz and Usher had a three-some with Chris Brown and possibly ran into Miguel on the way back from the bar.... if you know what I mean.

Sexy track, sexy man, what could possible go wrong?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=agl41SXH7mw

J. Cole: Lost Ones

Holy shit, this album is mind-blowingly amazing.  Even that might not do it justice.  Disclaimer: This song is very explicit, but it's straight from the heart.  Some songs shouldn't be censored, and this is one of them.  If one track can hit home, it'd be this one, whether you can relate with the struggles of teen pregnancy and poverty, or not.  To think this guy isn't on a Lil Wayne level baffles me.  Comparing lyrics would be a breeze; J. Cole with the knock out.

Just to add, this entire album is easily the best hip hop sampling I've heard in the past two years.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-vQ_VsTkn0

John Legend Ft Snoop Dog ( aka Snoop Lion): I Can Change

There are a million and one John Legend songs I'd love to slap on this list ("Coming Home" is another), but I figured I'd add a little uplifting track after the last one.  I can't tell you the countless hours I've spent listening to this song in traffic on I-95 on my way to DC (if you're a NOVA lass/lad, you'll know what I mean).  Who doesn't love a little gospel with some rap and the silky smooth voice of Legend?  Yeah, that would be nobody.

Check out all of his albums.  He was amazing even before he started doing choruses for Kanye West and such.  I promise.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LeZpx4rY4RY

Macklemore: Otherside

One of the best rappers around...  But he's white, so no one has ever heard of him.  Well, at least I'm here to save the day and change that.  So the song is named "Otherside" because it's a mix over the original by the Red Hot Chili Peppers. However, there are a few other mixes where it's put over other artist's tracks, same title though.  Although I could do without the news report interruptions, it's one hell of a piece of work (in a good way).  His other tracks include "Wings" about materialism and "Can't Get Enough" which is a great workout song.  Specifically while doing planks, because that's when I listen to it.

To continue about the song, it goes into the depths of being addicted to Oxycontin/Oxycodone.  But on a happier note, he's got a sick flow on every track.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWhx-CtPmBU


....

Well, I have work tomorrow, so toodles!  But I've got many more tracks like these to come.  The update might be behind a few other time-conscious posts, but it's definitely on my to do list.  I figured 10 tracks was enough at a time.

Also, I don't want to sound like a saleswoman, BUT..... if you're in the US (sorry, Canada, your copyright laws are a piece of shit) download Spotify and add some of my playlists if you'd like.  My username is Meg Mello, and most of today's tracks can be found under my "Alone On A Saturday Night", "Beats To Frat To," or "Swole" playlists.  I might compile them into a completely new one that will more than likely be labeled "Mello Beats" or something super original like that.

PLEASE comment/email me with some new tracks or ideas. amellobeat@blogspot.ca or @meg_mello on twitter (or just leave a comment in the box at the bottom).  I strongly feel as though music is an art that should be shared (legally, as I am a proud Spotify paid subscriber), so let us all know!


...to be continued.

xoxx Meg

Tuesday, 31 July 2012

College Hacks: Part 2

Ok, ok I'm trying my best to piece together some quality advice before it is too late for the rising freshies.  Expect a few posts of these hopefully before you guys head off to Never Never Land.

1. If Your Parents Offer To Buy It, FLIPPIN ACCEPT.

I know there is a feeling of guilt because the bills are piling high as your Target shopping cart over pours, but you know what feels worse?  Emailing your mom during your Geology 101 lecture in the middle of geographic layers of the Earth and trying to explain to her how you just need "a few more dollars to last me 'til the end of the semester" and it's only September.  So the next time your mommy goes "Sweetie don't you want an extra set of sheets?" say "YES" because that's probably worth like 2 and a half meals at Chipotle.  At least.

2. FUCKIN BOOKS.

I really don't mean to swear, but don't buy them... YET.  Some professors are really anal about buying and reading every letter on the page (Sciences), while others breeze over chapters (Philosophy).  Sometimes books are even on your kindle or iPad for a hell-a-lot cheaper.  However, there are a few catches.

Some books have online classroom passwords.  After you obtain such password, the book becomes a paperweight, because quite frankly it is useless from there on out.  So when you see a sick ass deal for a brand new book for $10, it's because the bastard used the password.  In order to avoid this, try just buying the password.  The prof usually posts it in the syllabus first day of class.

Also, join in on university buy/sell trading networks on Facebook.  People sell them for dirt cheap.  It's kind of a sanctuary of rebels against the book store's bull shit.  And when you go to sell your books back, here is the place to do it.  True story:  I was offered $7 back for $564 worth of books from second semester from the bookstore.  Yes, that is a single-digit "7", as in you couldn't buy a single bowl at Chipotle with that (sensing the theme?  Food is gold).


3. RateMyProfessors.com: http://www.ratemyprofessors.com/

Use it.  Like a bible.  I didn't realize just how much your professor matters until it was too late for me.  Now I frequently rate them to help kids like me pass. I'm serious, professors can and will be dicks, so it's better to use anything to your advantage.

4. Show Up On The First Day

This seems obvious, but the way that the system is set up, is that you will automatically be kicked out of the class if you do not attend (in 99.9% of cases).  So that class that you had stalked online for God knows how many hours over the summer?  Waste. Of. Life. if you don't wake up and get to class.  That also means on time, so PLAN. PLAN. PLAN.

Keep in mind you can also change classes.  So the minute you hear "Hey guys, you're going to have to memorize and identify over 100 rocks and their minerals during lab this year" RUN LIKE FUCKING HELL.  Also, if you have the sweetest, most wonderful friends who are on influential athletic teams, ask them for their schedule, because it will probably be with the easiest teachers and courses.  The first two years are typically General Education requirements anyways.

4.  Advisors.

Just nod your head and say yes.  They see thousands of students.  Make sure you have your shit together before you see them, because they sign off on anything.  Know your direction at the school, because I'm sure they'd love to have you another 4 years as long as your paying.

5. When They Say Pick 2, They Mean It.

Grades, Social, or Sleep.  But really, pick two.  I did not sleep AT ALL.  There is a ton of fun but learn to balance dat shit.  Eventually your body deteriorates and you are left crawling in pain locked in the back workout room calling your good friend on the phone while cramped on the floor pleading for mercy.  I'm not kidding, that is a true story.  So if you feel sick, sleep.  Or figure out some kind of schedule to recover.

6. DON'T LOSE YOUR CLICKER.

Math clicker/Response Clicker/That plastic piece of your heart.  I'm not exaggerating.  Mine was thrown into a river on the Alabama/Tennessee border and I couldn't respond in class for 3 days, which resulted in me nearly kissing my professors every footstep for extra credit.  It's not a pretty sight and you feel like pussy.  Also not a great feeling if you can't afford Starbucks anymore half way through semester.  They're $50 from the bookstore, but again, check on the groups.  Not every university's is the same, but you only need one all 4 years typically.  Therefore, many seniors sell them for $10 or so.

7. Athletes Eat THE BEST.

If you have the option to get the athlete meal plan and eat in their cafeteria, do it.  That shit is delicious and nutritious (I believe that was once a cereal box quote, ftw).  Just leave them alone and don't be an obnoxious fan girl/boy, and eat their food.  NOM.

8.  If Must Eat Elsewhere...

Avoid the fast food joints on campus.  They're fine until your dining dollars run out two months into semester and you're shit outta luck.  A meal at the on-campus Chick-fil-a will cost you $11 while the one 2 blocks off campus will cost you $8.  And trust me, there are times when you find ways where $3 can feed you for a month.

I feel like I also need a disclaimer about using Chick-Fil-A as a reference, and I'm sorry if I offended you, but just go with the flow.  That sauce is like heaven.


9. Put Your Headphones On And Walk Like The Flippin Wind

"Hi! Would you like to sign our petition to fight pandas in bikinis?"  "Hi! Would you like to save the goats?" "Hi would you like to die in a vortex full of completely useless and time consuming conversations regarding irrelevant things?"  There is one spot on your campus that will do this.  Hell, one hungover Friday morning I got a billboard sized (yes, BILLBOARD sized) picture of a fetus on my way to class with the title "Abortion is genocide."  To be honest, if you think that's true or not completely doesn't matter at 9AM as you still have black X marks on your hands and trying to keep your breakfast down.  The answer is to keep walking.  Ignore them, and they will leave.  I promise.

10.  GO GREEK (And By This I mean Sorority/Fraternity).

I can't elaborate much, but I think I will be doing a quick Greek Q-and-A within the next couple of days with the floods of questions I have been getting.  Mind you, I can't speak directly to any of you attending my school this fall, but hopefully I can answer some generally vague questions.
...For those of you on the fence of joining, we have Study Files.  If you don't know what those are, google it.

...As always, to be continued.

xox Meg



Saturday, 28 July 2012

RAVE 101

Although the Olympics have arrived, dubsteppers everywhere are getting ready to gather in Toronto for the great Veld Festival.  Many of you might not find dubstep to be "music," but let me tell you I don't really care what you think and more importantly it's a cult.  A cult I'm glad to be a part of.

So, for those of you who are joining us in the rave community (and we welcome you), I shall share with you some of the best advice I have before you set foot into the scariest, most thrilling night in a you'll ever have in a park.

NEON.  I can't stress that enough.  Going in all black is ok, but accessorize with some type of bright pink, yellow (or green, for all of you who are blind and clearly know it is yellow), or orange shit.  Don't be afraid to go all out.  I'm serious.  You'll see some crazy shit.  Like a guy in a zebra morph-suit and a chicken head (it has been done, so think of something else!). Headbands and wristbands are encourage because...

YOU WILL GET GROSS.  I'm not just talking "a bit distasteful" gross, I'm talking "holy shit, you're another race because of the dirt caked between your toes" gross.  As the night progresses and the lights dim, you'll be able to actually see the cloud of sweat and body heat above your head.  Your snot will be black for a week and that white shirt you thought you wore is now brown.  So don't wear a dress, because not even a homeless person will want to wear it after you. In fact, many clothes will go straight in the trash after.  Just accept it.

SHOES...SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES.  Sure, I've been to a few raves, but my last Skrillex concert nearly killed me.  I broke a toe (as much as my medical knowledge can conclude) because I thought I'd be "super cute" and wear these studded sandels. WRONG. Don't do that.  Wear boots, gawd-damn steel-toed ones if that's what it takes.  But remember, they will probably not live to see another day of casual wear, so choose wisely.

GET OVER YOUR FEAR OF ....EVERYTHING. If you get claustrophobia easy, don't go.  If you have this weird fear of ringworm, don't go.  If you hate sweat, particularly not your own, don't go.  If you don't like people, don't go.  If you don't like the risk of getting punched, don't go.  As I said, it is a rave "community," however, people get kray.  In fact, after you get over all those things and just release yourself into an alter-ego-ass-kickin-mindset, going to one of these will be one of the most stress-releaving experiences of your life.  Feel free to shove a little and join in the fun.  Just keep in mind, if you cannot handle any of these fears, you'll ruin the show for everyone else trying to weed your way through the enormous crown while we are having our fun.  So don't piss "us" people off.

DON'T BE AN IDIOT.  I'm not the kid to do drugs, but I know a lot of you probably will.  Here's a lesson everyone fails to remember, and consequently I've seen people suffer seizures from this...during the show.

Alcohol is a downer (depressant) while MDMA/"Molly"/Ecstasy is an upper.  I won't go into the whole science of it all (which is actually a cool, educational lesson if you ever have the spare time) but you need to use your head when taking these.  Uppers and downers shouldn't be mixed, that's the bottom line.

... and for all you "pro-plant" peeps, yes, there is plenty of a "following" there.

DRINK WATER AND MORE WATER...and more water and more water.  Water will turn into basically money.  For long set lists that are back-to-back-to-back, you'll feel your body dehydrate quickly.  Drink 3 bottles or so before (and use the bathroom!) or maybe even some gatorade.  Buy a water before you go into the crowd (they usually wont let you carry it in).  Passing out in a mosh pit would be epitome of suck.  I've seen a few kids with those water-backpacks for hiking, but don't feel the need to be that hard-core.

BRING A TALL FRIEND.  It just helps.  It's hard to spot people in a large crowd, ya know?  So if you have a spare one hanging around, he/she could be useful.

HAVE FUN.  It'll be tough at first, but once you get a few elbows to the face, you'll get in the vibe.  Everyone is just enjoying the music, as you should be to!!!

Here's an awesome picture of my feet after Skrillex.  Please don't let this happen to you.  Thankfully the dirt wiped right off, however, the toe repair was another story.



Hit me up with more questions/tips.
amellobeat@gmail.com or @meg_mello on twitter.




Thursday, 26 July 2012

You broke my heart, Alex.

I was planning on writing about music or other shenanigans, until it was recently brought to my attention that Alexander Semin has recently signed with the Carolina Hurricanes. For most people, this is a trivial fact, and they will carry on their lives just as if this was an ordinary day.  However, let me explain to you the extreme pain that is occurring inside my gentle, harmless heart.

Imagine Shemar Moore leaving Criminal Minds, or Dave Matthews leaving The Dave Matthews Band.  That shit just doesn't happen.  You have your own relationship, building trust with the characters or bandmates that you probably haven't met in your life.  So when they just up and go, you feel as though a piece of you and your childhood has been ripped out from beneath you.

In spite of his departure I'd like to send a message to Mr. Semin, as he parts ways with the best damn team in the league (I do not care for your own hockey opinions during this fragile time).

Dear Alexander Semin (Or "Sasha," as I once called you),

Please take your ego and stick it where the sun don't shine.  I, the most dedicated fan on the planet, watched as you scored those beautiful forehand-to-backhand wrist shots and then proceeded to get a holding penalty that would later cost us the game.  Yet, somehow still managed to love you.  Oh, and I paraded around high school with your name stitched on the back of my jersey as fellow classmates teased (that's "SEH-min" not "SEA-min" to all of you) and I still loved you. I watched as you played bongos on Marc Staal's backside because you didn't know that punching someone required a fist, but I still loved you.  Yeah, have fun explaining that moment to his brothers, you bitch.

So please, leave me and your undercover lover, Ovechkin, out in the cold as you head for Carolina.  I guess it's for the better.  But just remember, this was all you, not me.  I will have moved on by the time you return, begging for your contract and my loyalty back.

Goodbye,
Meg


And then maybe I'll slash his tires or something.  After all, I know what car he drives.


---------
Completely side update: it has been brought to my attention that anything shot on the backhand is just referred to as a "backhander" despite the wrist movement required.  I come in peace, all you hockey pros.

Tuesday, 24 July 2012

College Hacks (Part 1)


Many of my younger friends are about to take a leap of faith and join the college community.  As I wish you the best of luck, I want to send you off with the best gift ever:  shit you should know.

For those of you not a rising freshman, I hope this serves as a laugh or two as you reflect into your previous awkward years of life.

1.  Don't Throw ANYTHING Away

You're probably like, "Wut, how can this be?!  I'm an organizational freak who must throw away my previous life to make room for new memories and start fresh! [insert more cliche b.s. about the liberating feeling you expect when going to college]"  

Well, let me tell you that there are these things called parties, and they have a theme for every gawd-damn era on the planet. That 10th grade biology tie dye teeshirt?  There's a 70s party for that.  That high school uniform skirt that you thought was hideous?  There's this thing called a tailor.  So don't throw it away.  Ever.

2.  Orientation

So there you are with your parents as they scope out the wonderful "education" that you plan to get while attending your prestigious institute.  Then at the end of scamming your tag-a-longs into every Parents Society there is, they hand over to you two things: a snazzy draw-string backpack and this totally cool lanyard.  And with those two things I want to you immediately do this: 
Step one, put the lanyard in the bag.
Step two, hand the bag to parents.
Step three, never speak of said items again.

Trust me kid, I'm saving you some serious public humiliation on this one.

And while they're giving you what seems to be one of the longest damn tours of your life, take note of EVERYTHING.  Buy a map, put an X on your classes and highlight routes.  Short cuts will become evident after a few weeks.  Nothing is worse than wearing your new backpack with your dorm key lanyard while walking around like a lost puppy. NOTHING.

3.  Vehicles

I'm calling this section "vehicles" and not "cars" for a reason.  Know why?  Because they'll ticket anything that has wheels.  Hell, probably rollerblades.  So my advice to you is set aside a cool $150 per semester for tickets.  Because you will get them, they will take pictures, and they will refuse your cries for help no matter what cup size you are, ladies.

4.  Birth Control

There, I said it.  Now I know you're probably all like "waiting for THE one and all" but let me tell you, Jose Cuervo has an agenda of his own.  It happens to the best of us. Just remember, tequila doesn't pay child support when you can't remember "that one Saturday night at that one frat house."

5.  Dry Shampoo

Most dorms are community.  Unless you get super lucky and make friends on the football team who have their showers cleaned once a day, I suggest you invest in this stuff.

6.  Dining Schemes

So I'm not sure if you have yet to purchase your dining plans, or if you have to, but if you have the option, put down the form and slowly back away.  I can guarantee that the "freshmen 15" is not from your trusty pet Grey Goose, but rather from picking a school that happens to have a 24-hour iHop. Oh and ladies, start working out now.  If you're in the habit now, there is a 0.2% increase of a chance you'll continue to work out at school.  Take what you can get, my friend.

7.  Random Items You Should Make Your Parents Buy

Ladies: Norts (Nike Shorts; learn the term), Leggings, Uggs.  It's pretty much a nationwide standard. Also t's a good idea to run to the fabric store and pick up a couple of yards of white fabric for last minute toga parties.  You'll have a slimming toga compared to everyone else wrapped in stained twin-bed sheets. Also, just don't rub up against any guys these nights.  They typically don't wash their sheets before the go…

As for the dorm, I was given the best advice by my cousin. Buy an ottoman with a removable lid.  R.A's never check in there.

…to be continued.

xoxo Meg